Taking the Piss Out of Putin

As has been a much belabored topic of conversation in gay New York, President Vladimir Putin and his harem-o’-homophobes in Moscow declared public displays of homosexuality illegal in Russia, going so far as to threaten out athletes with imprisonment at the Sochi Olympic Games in 2014. Needless to say, this hasn’t gone over too well. Among other things, a boycott of all Russian vodka is sweeping the States, and is a PR dream come true for our spirituous allies from non-Russian locales. Absolut and Smirnoff, Swedish and British respectively, are the standard for gay-friendly vodkas, but here are five others that, pardon the pun, are worth a shot.

For Carl Nolet, Jr., Executive Vice President of Nolet Spirits USA, the distiller that makes Ketel One, it’s personal: “My brother-in-law is gay,” he says. “It’s a community that is personally very close to my heart.” An HRC supporter and GLAAD sponsor, Nolet himself was a presenter at the GLAAD Media Awards last April. Try and find something about this wheat-based vodka, or the country it is from, that isn’t gay-friendly. “Ketel One was built on the principle of having the courage to do what is right and the conviction to never compromise your integrity. We’re proud to share these values with the LGBT community,” Nolet says.

The name alone should be a big country-of-origin hint with this one. “We have worked with the gay community in the past, and we believe in total equality for all people on this planet, detesting any and all forms of discrimination,” says Hamptons Spirit Co. president Ronné Bonder, who named his award-winning vodka, the only one made from 100 percent yellow corn, after some very tony digs in Westhampton. Quadruple filtered and using pure spring water that is itself double filtered for good measure, über-classy Hamptons blew the lid off the prestigious San Francisco World Spirits Competition in 2006 by nabbing the double gold, and has been the darling of Wine Enthusiast (which gives Hamptons Vodka a near-perfect score of 92) and The Spirits Journal ever since.

“We absolutely support the pursuit of fair, just treatment of the international gay community,” says Marco Fantinel, one of the co-creators of this Italian vodka. “I Spirit has a double meaning. The ‘I’ stands for ‘Italian,’ but also for ‘independence’ of thought and action. The gay community fights for equal rights and equal treatment, for a world in which every person is free to live his or her life, independently and without interference, and we support that goal.” Their wines get the lion’s share of publicity, but I Spirit proves Italy can pump out a top-shelf vodka with the best of them.

True fact: any colorless, odorless spirit can qualify as a vodka so long as the alcohol content is over 30 percent. Another true fact: You can make it from just about anything. “Fair is the first vodka made from organic quinoa,” explains Alexandre Koiransky, founder of Fair Spirits. The name is more apropos than you think—this is also the first Fair Trade-certified spirit on the planet. Actual production is in the Cognac region of France, while Koiransky and master distiller Philip Laclie work in equal partnership with farmers in Bolivia for the best quinoa grown. Allez la France!

In homo-friendly American fashion, Blue Ice Vodka actually went and created a whole new drink, the “American Mule,” to bump off the Moscow Mule, ‘Murica style. Let the cocktail Cold War commence. “A fantastic cocktail with an American twist,” 21st Century Spirits’ Thomas Gibson smugly says of his new concoction. “We support the gay community; Blue Ice partnered with the Los Angeles Gay and Lesbian Association to be the official vodka for their Simply diVine benefit over the last two years,” Gibson happily points out. Take that, you tight-assed Bolsheviks.